The people who were the most satisfied in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest at age 80. Well, we’re human. So what have we learned? As director of the longest study on adult life and happiness, I've learned some surprising things about what the good life actually looks like. In that sense, the study itself represents a history of the changes that life brings. It never ends. We’ve learned three big lessons about relationships. From the looks of his humble, unadorned office at Mass General Hospital, you might never guess what Professor Robert J. Waldinger is up to: searching for the secrets to … It might be something as simple as replacing screen time with people time or livening up a stale relationship by doing something new together, long walks or date nights, or reaching out to that family member who you haven’t spoken to in years, because those all-too-common family feuds take a terrible toll on the people who hold the grudges. They became factory workers and lawyers and bricklayers and doctors, one President of the United States. Robert Waldinger, professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and Massachusetts General Hospital and head of the long-running Harvard Study of Adult Development, agreed that loneliness can impact health and warned But what if we could watch entire lives as they unfold through time? The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. What we’d really like is a quick fix, something we can get that’ll make our lives good and keep them that way. “When we gathered together everything we knew about them about at age 50, it wasn’t their middle-age cholesterol levels that predicted how they were going to grow old,” said Waldinger in a popular TED Talk. And those good relationships, they don’t have to be smooth all the time. Once we had followed our men all the way into their 80s, we wanted to look back at them at midlife and to see if we could predict who was going to grow into a happy, healthy octogenarian and who wasn’t. The study’s fourth director, Waldinger has expanded research to the wives and children of the original men. Psychiatrist Robert J. Waldinger, the study’s director and principal investigator, shared some of the major lessons in a popular TED Talk (What makes a good life? During the intervening decades, the control groups have expanded. Some participants went on to become successful businessmen, doctors, lawyers, and others ended up as schizophrenics or alcoholics, but not on inevitable tracks. “It’s easy to get isolated, to get caught up in work and not remembering, ‘Oh, I haven’t seen these friends in a long time,’ ” Waldinger said. Under the first director, Clark Heath, who stayed from 1938 until 1954, the study mirrored the era’s dominant view of genetics and biological determinism. It turns out that people who are more socially connected to family, to friends, to community, are happier, they’re physically healthier, and they live longer than people who are less well connected. Psychiatrist Robert Waldinger is the director of the longest study on happiness in history. Just like the millennials in that recent survey, many of our men when they were starting out as young adults really believed that fame and wealth and high achievement were what they needed to go after to have a good life. Relationships are messy and they’re complicated and the hard work of tending to family and friends, it’s not sexy or glamorous. That is the second-generation study, and Waldinger hopes to expand it into the third and fourth generations. Of the original Harvard cohort recruited as part of the Grant Study, only 19 are still alive, all in their mid-90s. In our study, we followed individuals as they progressed through life, seeing for ourselves what hindsight often misses. He is a psychiatrist, psychoanalyst and Zen priest. Those who kept warm relationships got to live longer and happier, said Waldinger, and the loners often died earlier. Rose Lincoln/Harvard Staff Photographer The study’s fourth director, Waldinger has expanded research to the wives and children of the original men. Over the years, researchers have studied the participants’ health trajectories and their broader lives, including their triumphs and failures in careers and marriage, and the finding have produced startling lessons, and not only for the researchers. And the third big lesson that we learned about relationships and our health is that good relationships don’t just protect our bodies, they protect our brains. “It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism.”. My name is Robert Waldinger, and I’m a Harvard psychiatrist, Zen priest, and psychoanalyst. We interview them in their living rooms. As the director of a 75-year-old study on adult development, Waldinger has unprecedented access to data on true happiness and satisfaction. And when, about a decade ago, we finally asked the wives if they would join us as members of the study, many of the women said, “You know, it’s about time.”. Since aging starts at birth, people should start taking care of themselves at every stage of life, the researchers say. “So I try to pay more attention to my relationships than I used to.”, Experts say cultural resources may help heal battered nation after brutal 2020, Michael Stern, CEO of The Climate Corporation, speaks of the need for farmers to immediately react to environmental setbacks as the effects of climate change reduce the viability of farm lands across the globe. High-conflict marriages, for example, without much affection, turn out to be very bad for our health, perhaps worse than getting divorced. The study showed that the role of genetics and long-lived ancestors proved less important to longevity than the level of satisfaction with relationships in midlife, now recognized as a good predictor of healthy aging. And the second group that we’ve followed was a group of boys from Boston’s poorest neighborhoods, boys who were chosen for the study specifically because they were from some of the most troubled and disadvantaged families in the Boston of the 1930s. “I want to see how childhood experiences affect developments of physical health, mental health, and happiness later in life.”. We went to their homes and we interviewed their parents. “We want to find out how it is that a difficult childhood reaches across decades to break down the body in middle age and later.”. Several studies found that people’s level of satisfaction with their relationships at age 50 was a better predictor of physical health than their cholesterol levels were. Some climbed the social ladder from the bottom all the way to the very top, and some made that journey in the opposite direction. Pictures of entire lives, of the choices that people make and how those choices work out for them, those pictures are almost impossible to get. More than a decade ago, researchers began including wives in the Grant and Glueck studies. In this talk, he shares three important lessons learned from the study as well as some practical, old-as-the-hills wisdom on how to build a fulfilling, long life. It was conducted by Harvard, and lasted over 75-years. “And those good relationships, they don’t have to be smooth all the time. “Good relationships keep us happier and healthier,” Dr. Robert Waldinger, a psychiatrist and director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, said in a viral “ TED Talk “ released in 2015. The good life is built with good relationships. So this message, that good, close relationships are good for our health and well-being, this is wisdom that’s as old as the hills. For 75 years, my team (and our predecessors) tracked the lives of 724 men. But over and over, over these 75 years, our study has shown that the people who fared the best were the people who leaned in to relationships, with family, with friends, with community. “It was how satisfied they were in their relationships. View What-Makes-A-Good-Life_-Lessons-From-the-Longest-Study-On-Happiness-by-Robert-Waldinger.pdf from BA 120 at Vietnam National University, Ho Chi Minh City. A few developed schizophrenia. Those ties protect people from life’s discontents, help to delay mental and physical decline, and are better predictors of long and happy lives than social class, IQ, or even genes. The researchers also found that marital satisfaction has a protective effect on people’s mental health. And we are now beginning to study the more than 2,000 children of these men. (Women weren’t in the original study because the College was still all male.). The founders of this study would never in their wildest dreams have imagined that I would be standing here today, 75 years later, telling you that the study still continues. It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism.”, “When the study began, nobody cared about empathy or attachment. Visit http://TED.com to get our entire library of TED Talks, transcripts, translations, personalized talk recommendations and more. And we’re constantly told to lean in to work, to push harder and achieve more. If you were going to invest now in your future best self, where would you put your time and your energy? We get their medical records from their doctors. Lara Tang ’18, a human and evolutionary biology concentrator who recently joined the team as a research assistant, relishes the opportunity to help find some of those answers. Early researchers believed that physical constitution, intellectual ability, and personality traits determined adult development. Every two years, our patient and dedicated research staff calls up our men and asks them if we can send them yet one more set of questions about their lives. We forget vast amounts of what happens to us in life, and sometimes memory is downright creative. The people in our 75-year study who were the happiest in retirement were the people who had actively worked to replace workmates with new playmates. But the people who were in unhappy relationships, on the days when they reported more physical pain, it was magnified by more emotional pain. Encouraging and interesting talk about Relationships: the key to a good life, by Robert Waldinger. What keeps us healthy and happy as we go through life? Among the original recruits were eventual President John F. Kennedy and longtime Washington Post editor Ben Bradlee. by Robert Waldinger What keeps us healthy and happy as we go through life? Study director, Dr. Robert Waldinger, was recently featured on CBS's "This Morning" TED Talk Our director Dr. Robert Waldinger recently gave a TED Talk in Boston about lessons from the first generation Study of Adult Development. Well, the lessons aren’t about wealth or fame or working harder and harder. “On the other hand, alcoholism and major depression could take people who started life as stars and leave them at the end of their lives as train wrecks.”. But through a combination of luck and the persistence of several generations of researchers, this study has survived. “Those who were clearly train wrecks when they were in their 20s or 25s turned out to be wonderful octogenarians,” he said. She joined the effort after coming across Waldinger’s TED talk in one of her classes. Robert Waldinger is a psychiatrist, psychoanalyst and Zen priest. And the people in relationships where they feel they really can’t count on the other one, those are the people who experience earlier memory decline. The more factors the subjects had in place, the better the odds they had for longer, happier lives. にするものは何でしょう？名声や富 ― そう考える人はたくさんいます。しかし、心理学者ロバート・ウォールディンガーに拠ると、それは間違っているのです。 They were given medical exams. The people who were the most satisfied in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest at age 80.”. He recorded his TED talk, titled “What Makes a Good Life? Let’s say you’re 25, or you’re 40, or you’re 60. After following the surviving Crimson men for nearly 80 years as part of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the world’s longest studies of adult life, researchers have collected a cornucopia of data on their physical and mental health. Trained as a psychoanalyst, Vaillant emphasized the role of relationships, and came to recognize the crucial role they played in people living long and pleasant lives. When they entered the study, all of these teenagers were interviewed. “Aging is a continuous process,” Waldinger said. Asked what lessons he has learned from the study, Waldinger, who is a Zen priest, said he practices meditation daily and invests time and energy in his relationships, more than before. People who are more isolated than they want to be from others find that they are less happy, their health declines earlier in midlife, their brain functioning declines sooner and they live shorter lives than people who are not lonely. Those who had unhappy marriages felt both more emotional and physical pain. To get the clearest picture of these lives, we don’t just send them questionnaires. That finding proved true across the board among both the Harvard men and the inner-city participants. “Good relationships don’t just protect our bodies; they protect our brains,” said Waldinger in his TED talk. He is Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and directs the Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the longest-running studies of adult life ever done. Robert Waldinger, a psychiatrist, professor at Harvard Medical School, and the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development decided to find that one thing that makes a good life, helps us become happier and healthier. What Keeps Us Healthy and Happy? And the experience of loneliness turns out to be toxic. And another 50 percent of those same young adults said that another major life goal was to become famous. I direct the Harvard Study of Adult Development, which is possibly the longest study of adult life ever done. And the sad fact is that at any given time, more than one in five Americans will report that they’re lonely. The fourth director of the study, Robert Waldinger, a psychiatrist at Massachusetts General Hospital and a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, said the study … 1937 - - Clark Heath and Arlie Bock –physicians at HUHS envisioned studying health They would not have dreamed that the Study would continue for almost 70 years Most longitudinal studies never He is Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and directs the Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the longest-running studies of adult life ever done. The first group started in the study when they were sophomores at Harvard College. What might leaning in to relationships even look like? “You can see how people can start to differ in their health trajectory in their 30s, so that by taking good care of yourself early in life you can set yourself on a better course for aging. And I’m the fourth director of the study. Most of what we know about human life we know from asking people to remember the past, and as we know, hindsight is anything but 20/20. “It will probably never be replicated,” he said of the lengthy research, adding that there is yet more to learn. Close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives, the study revealed. “The surprising finding is that our relationships and how happy we are in our relationships has a powerful influence on our health,” said Robert Waldinger, director of the study, a psychiatrist at Massachusetts General Hospital and a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. Vaillant’s research highlighted the role of these protective factors in healthy aging. The research also debunked the idea that people’s personalities “set like plaster” by age 30 and cannot be changed. Many of the inner city Boston men ask us, “Why do you keep wanting to study me? We’re given the impression that these are the things that we need to go after in order to have a good life. So what about you? Second in an occasional series on how Harvard researchers are tackling the problematic issues of aging. January 1, 2016 by Robert Waldinger There is much we can learn about the good life from simply listening to those who have lived it. The ongoing Harvard study is considered one of the world’s longest studies of adult life, having started in 1938 during the Great Depression. Why is this so hard to get and so easy to ignore? “Taking care of your body is important, but tending to your relationships is a form of self-care too. “We’re trying to see how people manage stress, whether their bodies are in a sort of chronic ‘fight or flight’ mode,” Waldinger said. Our most happily partnered men and women reported, in their 80s, that on the days when they had more physical pain, their mood stayed just as happy. 精神科医、心理学者のロバート・ウォールディンガー氏「よい人生をもたらすものとは？幸せに関する最長の研究の結果からの学び」となります。, 一生を通し、私達を幸福で健康にするものは何でしょう？名声や富 ―そう考える人はたくさんいます。しかし、心理学者ロバート・ウォールディンガー氏は「間違っている」と発言しています。75年に渡る成人発達に関する研究のディレクターであるウォールディンガーは、真の幸福と満足感に関する無類のデータをベースに、この研究結果が私達に教える「３つの重要な教訓」「昔からの知恵」「幸せな長寿の秘訣を」をTEDで語ります。. My name is Robert Waldinger, and I'm a Harvard psychiatrist, psychoanalyst, and Zen priest. We videotape them talking with their wives about their deepest concerns. Researchers also found that those with strong social support experienced less mental deterioration as they aged. It turns out that living in the midst of conflict is really bad for our health. They made detailed anthropometric measurements of skulls, brow bridges, and moles, wrote in-depth notes on the functioning of major organs, examined brain activity through electroencephalograms, and even analyzed the men’s handwriting. For 75 years, we’ve tracked the lives of 724 men, year after year, asking about their work, their home lives, their health, and of course asking all along the way without knowing how their life stories were going to turn out. Some of our octogenarian couples could bicker with each other day in and day out, but as long as they felt that they could really count on the other when the going got tough, those arguments didn’t take a toll on their memories. Most lived in tenements, many without hot and cold running water. From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Robert J. Waldinger (born 1951) is an American psychiatrist and Professor at Harvard Medical School. Lessons from the Longest Study on Happiness,” in 2015, and it has been viewed 13,000,000 times. “But the key to healthy aging is relationships, relationships, relationships.”. We did that. The first is that social connections are really good for us, and that loneliness kills. I’d like to close with a quote from Mark Twain. More than a century ago, he was looking back on his life, and he wrote this: “There isn’t time, so brief is life, for bickerings, apologies, heartburnings, callings to account. There is only time for loving, and but an instant, so to speak, for that.”. Lessons from the longest study on happiness). Professor Robert Waldinger is director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the world’s longest studies of adult life. Social psychologist details research at University-wide faculty seminar, Professor of medicine and Chan School graduate is MGH infectious diseases chief, Chan School Dean Williams details need for Biden ‘action agenda’, Medical School researchers uncover link between obesity, cancer, © 2020 The President and Fellows of Harvard College. Robert Waldinger on Happiness Following is the full transcript of American psychiatrist Robert Waldinger’s talk titled “What Makes A Good Life?Lessons From the Longest Study On Happiness” at TED conference. The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Since 1938, we’ve tracked the lives of two groups of men. Psychiatrist George Vaillant, who joined the team as a researcher in 1966, led the study from 1972 until 2004. My life just isn’t that interesting.” The Harvard men never ask that question. What are the lessons that come from the tens of thousands of pages of information that we’ve generated on these lives? If you were going to invest now in your future best self, where would you put your time and your energy? There was a recent survey of millennials asking them what their most important life goals were, and over 80 percent said that a major life goal for them was to get rich. Almost all projects of this kind fall apart within a decade because too many people drop out of the study, or funding for the research dries up, or the researchers get distracted, or they die, and nobody moves the ball further down the field. “That motivated me to do more research on adult development,” said Tang. Researchers who have pored through data, including vast medical records and hundreds of in-person interviews and questionnaires, found a strong correlation between men’s flourishing lives and their relationships with family, friends, and community. According to the study, those who lived longer and enjoyed sound health avoided smoking and alcohol in excess. Lessons From the It was how satisfied they were in their relationships. What makes us happy and healthy as we go through life?If you want to invest in "the good life," where should you put your time and energy? And good, close relationships seem to buffer us from some of the slings and arrows of getting old. It turns out that being in a securely attached relationship to another person in your 80s is protective, that the people who are in relationships where they really feel they can count on the other person in times of need, those people’s memories stay sharper longer. In the 1970s, 456 Boston inner-city residents were enlisted as part of the Glueck Study, and 40 of them are still alive. Robert Waldinger is the Director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the most comprehensive longitudinal studies in history. For 75 years, we’ve tracked the lives of 724 men, year after year, asking about their work, their home lives, their health, and of course asking all along the way without knowing how their life stories were going to turn out. He is known for a TED talk about his findings from the Grant Study, a longitudinal study on adult happiness that's based at … Robert Waldinger is a psychiatrist, psychoanalyst and Zen priest. The study, like its remaining original subjects, has had a long life, spanning four directors, whose tenures reflected their medical interests and views of the time. “Loneliness kills,” he said. 2002- Robert Waldinger, M.D. Waldinger, the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, said in a viral 2015 "TED Talk" released in 2015, that "good relationships keep … In a book called “Aging Well,” Vaillant wrote that six factors predicted healthy aging for the Harvard men: physical activity, absence of alcohol abuse and smoking, having mature mechanisms to cope with life’s ups and downs, and enjoying both a healthy weight and a stable marriage. Period. “We’re going to have to figure out how to grow a lot more food on a lot less land and do it sustainably.”, “Loneliness kills. The best advice I can give is ‘Take care of your body as though you were going to need it for 100 years,’ because you might.”. If you think it's fame and money, you're not alone – but, according to psychiatrist Robert Waldinger, you're mistaken. Well, the possibilities are practically endless. What Makes A Good Life? When scientists began tracking the health of 268 Harvard sophomores in 1938 during the Great Depression, they hoped the longitudinal study would reveal clues to leading healthy and happy lives. 一生を通して私たちを 健康で幸福にしてくれるのは 何でしょう？ 最高の未来の自分に投資するなら自分の時間とエネルギーを何に使いますか 新世紀世代を最近調査し最も大切な人生の目的は何かと訊ねました。80%以上の答えは主な人生の目的は富を蓄える事でその同じ若者の50%のもう１つの大きな目的は有名になる事でした。, 働き更なる努力をしもっと成果を出すようにと常に求められている世の中です。良い人生を送る為には、そうする必要があると誰もが思わされています。自分の全人生を— 自分の選択がどう人生を描いて行くかを予測するなんて殆ど不可能です。人の人生に関してはその人の過去を思い出してもらう事で分かりますがご存知のようにそれはあまり頼りにはなりません。過去に起きた内の膨大な量は忘れ去られ時には完全に創作された記憶さえあります。, では、ある人の全人生が展開されるのを観察しながら記録できないものでしょうか？人々を10代の頃から老年まで追い幸福と健康の持続に本当に何が必要なのか探索しようと始めたのが 我々の研究です。, ハーバード成人発達研究は 史上最も長期に渡って成人を追跡した研究です。75年間724人の男性を追跡し休むことなく仕事や家庭生活健康などを記録しました。勿論 の期間中我々は彼らの人生がどう展開するかは知る由もありませんでした。, この様な研究は非常に稀です。こんな計画は10年もしない内に頓挫してしまいます。あまりに多くの人が途中でプロジェクトを降りてしまう。研究の資金が不足して来る研究者達が他の事で忙しくなったり亡くなってしまうなどが原因で進行が止まってしまうからです。我々の場合は運が良かった事もあり数世代の研究者達の根気強さのお陰でこの研究は生き残りました。元の724人の内の約60人が未だ健在で今も研究に参加しています。その殆どが90歳代です。新しく研究に２千人以上の彼らの子供達にも参加してもらっています。私は４代目の研究責任者です。, 1938年以来男性の２グループを 追跡しています。１番目のグループは研究が始まった時 ハーバード大学の２年生で第２次世界大戦中に大学を卒業し殆どが戦争に行きました。２番目のグループにはボストンの極貧環境で育った少年達がこの研究の為に選ばれました。1930年代のボストンで最も問題の多い貧困家庭出身の人達だからという理由からです。水道設備もないような安アパートに彼らの殆どが住んでいました 。, 研究が始まるとすぐ 10代の彼らをインタビューし健康診断を受けさせました。我々は彼らの家に行きご両親達もインタビューしました。その少年達が今大人になり様々な人生を歩んでいます。工場労働者や弁護士 レンガ職人や医師になったり１人はアメリカの大統領になりました。中にはアル中になった人や 統合失調症になった人もいます。この様に社会の底辺から這い上がりずっと上まで登り詰めた人もいる一方それとは反対の方向に人生を 辿って行った人もいるのです。, この研究の創始者達は思いもしなかった事でしょう。75年後今日ここに私が立って研究は未だに続いている事をこうして話しているなんて１年おきに我々の仕事熱心な忍耐強い研究スタッフが参加者に電話をし彼らの生活に関しての質問表を送っても良いかと訊ねると。, ボストンスラム街の男性の多くはこう問い返します。「なぜ俺を研究し続けたいんだ？ 俺の生活は面白くもないだろう」ハーバード群からは決して出ない質問です。, 彼らの生活をしっかり把握する為質問表を送るだけが仕事ではありません。参加者の居間でインタビューしたり彼らの医者から医療記録も手に入れます。血液検査をし脳画像を撮り子供達からも話を聞き彼らが妻と最も気がかりな事に関して話し合っている所を撮影します。約10年前参加者の妻達にも 研究参加をとお願いすると彼女等の多くはこう言いました。 「そう言ってくれるのを待ってたわ」と, これから分かった事は彼らの人生から得た何万ページにもなる情報から分かった事は何でしょう？それは富でも名声でも無我夢中で働く事でもなく75年に渡る研究からはっきりと分かった事は私たちを健康に幸福にするのは良い人間関係に尽きるという事です。これから人間関係に関して３つの大きな教訓がありました。, 第一に周りとの繫がりは 健康に本当に良いという事孤独は命取りで家族友達コミュニティとよく繋がっている人程幸せで身体的に健康で繫がりの少ない人より長生きするという事が分かりました。孤独は害となるという研究結果が出たのです。孤立化を甘んじて受け生活している人はあまり幸せに感じていないのです。中年になり健康の衰えは早く脳機能の減退も早期に始まり孤独でない人より寿命は短くなります。悲しい現実ですがこれから先いつでも アメリカ人の２割以上は孤独だと回答するでしょう。しかし群衆の中や結婚生活の中でも。, 孤独を感じることはあります。つまりここで重大な事は友人の数だけがものをいうのではなく生涯を共にする相手の有無でもないのです。重要なのは身近な人達との関係の質なのです。争いの真っただ中で暮らすのは健康に悪い事が分かっています。例えば愛情が薄い喧嘩の多い結婚は健康に悪影響を及ぼし恐らく離婚より悪いでしょう。愛情のある良い関係は人を保護します。, 我々は参加者全員を追跡し彼らが80代になった時中年の彼らを振り返り誰が健康で幸せな80代になったか予測してみたかったのです。彼らが50才の頃に得た彼らのデータを全て 集めてみると中年のコレステロール値等とは関連性はなくどの様な老年を迎えるかは当時の人間関係の満足度で予測される事が分かりました。50才で最も幸せな人間関係にいた人が 80才になっても一番健康だったのです。親密な良い関係がクッションとなり加齢過程での様々な問題を和らげてくれてるようです。中でも特にパートナー共に幸福だと感じていた人達は 80代になり身体的苦痛があっても精神的に幸福だという報告が出ています。しかし不幸な関係にある人達は身体的苦痛がある日には精神的苦痛でその身体的苦痛が更に増幅されていました。, 人間関係と健康に関して分かった３つ目の大きな事は良い関係は身体の健康だけでなく脳をも守ってくれるという事です。堅固な良い関係をしっかりと 80代にまで持ち続ける人はその関係に守られています。そういう関係にいる人— 何かあった時本当に頼れる人がいると感じている人の記憶ははっきりしています。一方パートナーには 全く頼れないと感じている人には記憶障害が早期に現れ始めます。良い人間関係といっても波風がない訳ではありません ある80代のカップルは明けても暮れても小言を言い合っているかも知れませんがお互い頼り合えると感じている限り彼らが苦難に遭遇した時口論しても後々まで残るという事はありませんでした。, この教え— 親密で良い関係は 包括的に私たちに益となっているという教えは今に分かった事ではありませんね。何故そんな関係は築き難く 無視され易いのでしょう。誰もそうですが私たちは手っ取り早く手に入れられる生活を快適に維持してくれるものが大好きです。人間関係は複雑に込み入っています 家族や友達との関係をうまく維持して行くのは至難の業です。その地道な努力は地味でその上その仕事は死ぬまで続きます。75年間に渡る研究で定年退職後 一番幸福な人は仕事仲間に代わる新しい仲間を自ら進んで作った人達です。最近の調査での新世紀世代のようにこの研究の参加者の多くは彼らが青年期に入った時名声や富や業績が良い生活をするには必要なものだと本当に信じていましたが75年もの間我々の研究で繰り返し繰り返し示されたのは最も幸せに過ごして来た人は人間関係に頼った人々だという事したそれは家族友達やコミュニティだったり様々です。, あなたはどうですか？ 今 あなたが25才 40才 60才なら あなたが人間関係に頼るとは どういう事なのかでしょうか？, あなたに出来る事は実際無限にあります。テレビやPCの前の時間を人と過ごす時間に充てる新鮮さを失った関係を活気づける為何か新しい事をパートナーとする長い散歩とかデートなどです。また何年も話していない家族に連絡を取るのも１つの方法です。よくある家族のいざこざは遺恨を抱く人々にひどい悪影響を及ぼすからです。, 最後にマーク・トウェインの言葉を引用して終わります。一世紀以上むかし彼は人生を振り返りこう書きました。「かくも短い人生に諍い謝罪し傷心し 責任を追及している時間などない愛し合う為の時間しかないそれが例え一瞬にすぎなくとも」, 次回のコメントで使用するためブラウザーに自分の名前、メールアドレス、サイトを保存する。, このサイトはスパムを低減するために Akismet を使っています。コメントデータの処理方法の詳細はこちらをご覧ください。, 海外でトータル10年ちょいブラブラしてつい最近帰国しました。NZワーホリ→AUSワーホリ→NZで学生→海外旅行→NZで就職→一旦帰国。行ったことのある国の数は50+でヨーロッパ、オセアニア、アジア中心です。, 日本だけにとどまらずに世界への一歩を応援できるサイトを目指しております。このブログを読んでいただきそっと後押しできたら光栄です。, まずは英語になります。長文ですが特に難しい単語は使われていないので意外にすいすい頭に入ってきます。ちょっと難しいよという方は２の日本語からもしくは３の動画から見てみましょう。, いかがでしたでしょうか？幸せになるためにはお金、名声、地位、ではなく「良好な人間関係」ということが大事です。, これだけを聞くときれいごとになってしまいますが、毎日嫌な人間関係に悩まされ鬱になり暗い生活を送るのであれば、そこまで給料がよくなくても上司や部下といい関係が築ける会社で働いたほうがいいなどと思った方も多いと思います。, 幸せになりたいのであれば目先の数字にとらわれずに、「何が必要な要素なのか？」ということを考えれたら自分自身のレベルがアップしそうですね。, ダニエルピンク 【やる気に関する驚きの科学】tedモチベーションスピーチ英語＆日本語訳. About 60 of our original 724 men are still alive, still participating in the study, most of them in their 90s. For the inner-city men, education was an additional factor. "The people who were the most satisfied in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest at age 80,” said Robert Waldinger with his wife Jennifer Stone. Now, researchers draw men’s blood for DNA testing and put them into MRI scanners to examine organs and tissues in their bodies, procedures that would have sounded like science fiction back in 1938. The Harvard Study of Adult Development may be the longest study of adult life that’s ever been done. That, I think, is the revelation.”. They all finished college during World War II, and then most went off to serve in the war. If you think it's fame and money, you're not alone – but, according to psychiatrist Robert Waldinger, you're mistaken. Sign up for daily emails to get the latest Harvard news. But the key to healthy aging is relationships, relationships, relationships.”, How pandemic set back efforts to fight other deadly global health problems, Brighter days for arts forecast in Biden administration. What if we could study people from the time that they were teenagers all the way into old age to see what really keeps people happy and healthy? “When the study began, nobody cared about empathy or attachment,” said Vaillant. Some developed alcoholism. And when we gathered together everything we knew about them at age 50, it wasn’t their middle age cholesterol levels that predicted how they were going to grow old. And we know that you can be lonely in a crowd and you can be lonely in a marriage, so the second big lesson that we learned is that it’s not just the number of friends you have, and it’s not whether or not you’re in a committed relationship, but it’s the quality of your close relationships that matters. Part of a study found that people who had happy marriages in their 80s reported that their moods didn’t suffer even on the days when they had more physical pain. In part of a recent study, researchers found that women who felt securely attached to their partners were less depressed and more happy in their relationships two-and-a-half years later, and also had better memory functions than those with frequent marital conflicts. In tenements, many without hot and cold running water, people should start taking care of your body important... 1970S, 456 Boston inner-city residents were enlisted as part of the world’s longest studies of adult,... Sophomores at Harvard Medical School of those same young adults said that another major goal... In 2015, and 40 of them robert waldinger study their 20s or 25s turned out to be toxic might in... Waldinger is a psychiatrist, psychoanalyst, and but an instant, so to speak for. 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